Insurance Limit Question?

Okay, l will try to make this short. I was in a car accident in October 2008, my car was totaled and it was not my fault. Since the accident I have had one xray, two CAT scans, five MRIs, three cervical injections, one EMG, a discogram and been in physical therapy for 7 months three times a week. Originally I was told from the MRI, I had one herniation in my neck, three bulging discs in my neck and one bulging disc in my lower back, a back sprain, painful muscles spasms, and nerve damages in my arms, hands and left leg. During the discogram (which is very painful but soooo beneficial) it was discovered I have three very bad herinations just in my neck (not mentioning that one in my back, laying on my nerve) that are beyond repair. In conclusion, I will have to have a three level disc fusion in order to repair and even then will never be back to normal I have been told I have been through h*ll because of this accident. My airway punctured and filled with blood during the last procedure causing my to have trouble breathing and chest pain that I am still having! I can barely function at times. I am 29 years old with three children. I used to be active, loved to cook and garden. I am barely able to get off the couch. It is depressing. My 12 year old daughter recently said, "you are different person now, I miss the old you, mommy". It killed me to hear that. I was also ped up for a big promotion at work and my prior boss was trying to get rid of me because he felt my injuries were "hampering my job ability". The lady who caused the accident is 78, she seemed very nice and appears to be a all around good person, ie pillar in her community, organizes various charities, and is very involved in Church. She actually reminds me of someone VERY dear to me. If her auto limits don't cover all of my expenses, will they be able to obtain money from her home insurance instead of her directly? I don't know how this works and I don't want anything to come from her directly meaning I don't want any of her savings or her to lose her home over this. I don't want this to financially crippled her and her family. I wouldn't be able to do that and sleep at night. If her limits are too low, I won't go through with the surgery as I cannot afford to be stuck with the cost either. Has anyone been in a similar situation? My significant other says I am making it personal and she shouldn't have been driving. I agree, but it was an ACCIDENT, and I don't think an accident should cause someone to lose everything. Just an FYI, my medical expenses are already over $80K without the surgery and medical care afterward. Thanks everyone! I appreciate any opinions.